I’ll show you mine if you show me yours!  Here are my cruise tips for saving wear and tear on body and soul.  I’d love to get a few tips from you as well.  And, because air travel is so unpredictable, several tips are especially important and noted as a “NEW RULE”.

1.  To arrive with wrinkle-free clothing for dressy nights, put each outfit in a plastic dry cleaner’s bag and lay in suitcase. I put items on hangars so they go directly from bag to closet.

2.  If you like to lie in the sun, use a very high sun block and reapply frequently, even if the label claims its waterproof.  Since I love a tan as much as anyone, I apply it the morning right after my shower with a self-tanner.

3.  When flying to meet a ship sailing from a port that is more than a ten minute ride from the airport, buy an airport transfer from the cruise line through your travel agent.  Saves time, money and aggravation.

4. NEW RULE!  Never cruise without buying insurance from your travel agent.   I’ve been told by knowledgeable insiders that Travel Access and Travel Guard are more likely to reimburse justified expenses than the cruise lines’ own insurance company.

5.  I never board an airplane without ear plugs or an iPod.  Crying babies drive me nuts!

6. If you’re sailing from New York’s Manhattan or Brooklyn pier, take Amtrak to avoid driving.  Not only is gas prohibitively expensive but it costs $30 per day to park a car in the Manhattan port parking lot.  

7.  Take a bunch of singles for tipping all the people who have earned a gratuity along the way.

8. NEW RULE!  When flying to meet the ship, don’t pack any items in your suitcase you can’t stand to loose forever.  These include documents, medication, jewelry, eye glasses, electronics gear.

9.  I consider a carry-on bag with wheels necessary because of all the stuff I have to haul because my suitcase may not arrive outside my cabin door for three or four hours.  In addition to the items cited in the above tip, add a change of clothes and shoes plus toiletries. 

10. If your heart is set on a cozy table for two at dinner aboard a ship with assigned seating, ask your travel agent to pull whatever strings necessary to reserve one the moment you book.  If that’s not possible, run to the dining room the moment you board to reserve your table.

11. When planning your own shore excursions, take the name and phone number of the cruise line’s local port agent, which is listed in the daily program delivered to your stateroom.   If a problem or delay occurs, it’s an important contact number to have.

12.  The moment you board the ship plan to run to the spa to book treatments, the VCR library (the best go first) and make reservations in an alternative restaurant.

13. Is it me or have cruise lines reduced staff on the pier, resulting in extra long waiting time to process documents and board the ship?   Take the torture out of waiting by having an Ipod, trashy book or magazine to read while standing in line.

14.  If you plan on buying a cruise line T-shirt in the ship’s boutique, wait until the last day when stacks of them are on sale.

15.  Don’t even think of buying grass during your Caribbean or Mexico cruise then packing it in a suitcase to disembark the ship.  Before you reach your bag on the pier dogs with remarkable olfactory talents will have scanned all the luggage.  Getting busted by DEA agents is a lousy ending to a perfect cruise.

16. No, you can’t bring bottles of any alcohol aboard ship.  But you may be interested in reading what other cruisers do to bypass this rule.  See the comments in “Taking Alcohol Aboard A Ship”.

17.  You can determine the age of passengers likely to sail on a ship by checking the duration of the voyage.  Two-to-five-day cruises carry the youngest passengers, on one-week voyages there will be a predominance of passengers aged 25 to 60 and on cruises over a week, most passengers are retired. 

18.  To save money aboard ship, decide your cruise will be alcohol free.  If you have a problem doing that, check out ”Friends of Bill W” meetings scheduled daily aboard the ship.

19. NEW RULE! Do not cruise without travel insurance, especially if you must fly to meet the ship.  Delays and cancellations are rampant and without insurance, it’s your nickel to fly to the next port.  I recommend Travel Access and Travel Guard insurance, which is available through your travel agent or online.

20.  A night light comes in handy because black-out drapes mean the cabin will be pitch dark. It helps to avoid crashing into furniture when trying to reach the bathroom during the night.

21.  NEW RULE!  Sometimes cruise lines offer lower-priced airfare to entice you to cruise (a good deal).  However, be sure to double check the air rate yourself.  If you’re booking far out, it may be better to purchase your own air — especially with cruise lines who won’t guarantee the air rate until the final payment is made.

22.  Before booking a cruise that will require you to purchase an airline ticket, make sure seats are available to and from the ship’s home port.  Airlines are cutting capacity to many vacation destinations (Orlando & Hawaii: -25%, Ft. Lauderdale down 10%). 

23.  Never, never, never select one ship over another based on price alone, especially when food and service, children’s facilities or the itinerary is important.  

24.  If you contact a travel agent to book a specific cruise line and the agent tries to steer you to another cruise company instead, I suggest finding a new agent.

25. Royal Caribbean, Carnival and Norwegian Cruise Line carry the most families with children.  While there are few kid-free cruises today, especially during school vacation period, you’ll find fewer children on Princess, Holland America and Celebrity if that’s what you’re seeking.

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Late this afternoon I came across a news item of interest, that a cruise ship carrying 1,200 passengers has been detained in New York by the U.S. Coast Guard for safety violations.  In fact they found 66 violations including damage to the hull.  And, none of the news organizations appeared to know the ship’s name or cruise line.

HUH?  That’s certainly a first for me.  I mean, you can’t tell the name or owner of the ship?  Impossible.

Granted, it took a bit of digging but here are the details.  The name of the ship is The Peace Boat, charted by a non-profit Japanese outfit, Peaceboat , which sails around the globe “to promote peace, human rights, equal and sustainable development and respect for the environment.”  The ship was sailing between Greenland and Venezuela when the Coast Guard decided to board the ship and inspect it.  

Ships don’t normally have holes in their hull but given this ship’s history, it’s understandable.  According to Wikipedia, the Peace Boat was built in 1955 as the Empress of Britain sailing transatlantic between Canada and Europe. In 1975, she was purchased by Carnival Cruise lines as one of the original “Fun Ships”, the Carnivale.  From 1993 through 1997 she sailed for Epirotiki and Royal Olympic as the Festa Marina and Olympic.  Today she is owned by Topaz Holdings of Greece, which charters the ship to the Peace Boat folks.

There may be a vessel built before 1955 that is still afloat, but I can’t find it.

According to local media, passengers are delighted to hang out in New York while Topaz Holdings’ owners figure out how to correct the safety problems.  And it’s nice to know that not all geriatic vessels are immediately sold for scrap metal, as the SS Norway  was two years ago.  

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Art Auctions are such a big source of profit for the cruise lines that the “galleries” art located in a central area of public space and they are heavily promoted in daily programs.  In a New York Times article, passengers who are less than satisfied with the purchase of art when they arrive home sometimes turn to lawsuits against Park West Gallery, which runs the auctions on the ships of every cruise line except Princess (which operates its own art auctions). 

To read the Times’ report, click “Art Auctions on Cruise Ships Lead to Anger, Accusations and Lawsuits”. 

According to the Times article, one problem is that auctioneers claim that the art is worth tens of tousands of dollars and “a good investment”.  However, some cruisers return home to discover it’s worth a fraction of the what they paid.  Park West claims that none of their staff promise anything of the sort.  Well this cruiser has heard those promises dozens of times aboard many cruise ships over the years.  I suggest running “complaints against Park West” in Google to read about others less than satisfied with their purchase.

Have you purchased art on a ship?  Were you pleased with your purchase?

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Editor’s Note:  If a cruise deal jumps out at you, I suggest acting fast!  The best cabins and the best prices go first.

***  Crystal Cruises is discounting March and April, 2009 Asia cruises aboard Crystal Symphony.  Stateroom upgrades worth more than $1,800 and penthouse savings of $2,000 are available on select savings.   In addition Crystal is offering three-day land programs in Beijing at no extra charge on China/Japan voyages.  The itineraries are the 15-day March 27 and April 5, 2009 cruises between Hong Kong and Beijing and an 11-day voyage from Hong Kong to Singapore departing April 20, 2009.  Contact your travel agent.

*** Six-day Western Caribbean cruise of Carnival Destiny departing Sept. 21, 2008 sails round-trip from Miami with fares starting at $399 (inside); $499 (ocean view) and $599 (balcony) per person, double occupancy.  Contact Cruise.com.

*** Six-night Queen Mary 2 transatlantic crossing from New York to Southampton starting at $798 (inside) and $1,053 (balcony) on the Aug. 7, 2008 departure.  Visit America’s Vacation Center for further information.

*** One week Mediterranean cruise aboard NCL’s Norwegian Gem sailing round-trip from Barcelona starts at $339 per person, double occupancy.  The Oct. 26, Nov. 2 and 9, 2008 departures visit Malta; Naples; Civitavecchia (Rome); Livorno (Florence) and Nice, France.  For additional information, visit White Travel’s web site.

*** 15-night “Circle Hawaii” cruise aboard Holland America’s Zaandam sailing round-trip from San Diego.  On the Oct. 23 and Nov. 22, 2008 departures, rates begin at $1,499 (inside); $1699 (oceanview); and $3,099 (balcony) per person, double occupancy.  Visit Cheap Tickets web site.

*** Seven-night Caribbean Princess Canada & New England cruises sailing round trip from Brooklyn, NY, with multiple departures between Sept. 7 and Oct. 19, 2008.  Inside cabins begin at $599; outside start from $698 and balcony staterooms are $1099 per person, double occupancy.  Visit Seven Seas Travel’s web site. 

*** Five-night Carnival Elation Mexico cruise sailing round-trip from San Diego.  The Jan. 10, 19 and 24, 2009 departures start at $239 (inside) and $329 (outside).  Visit Cruise 411 for details.

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The season’s second named hurricane, Bertha, swirls off the east coast of the United States making her way slowly north. She may strike Bermuda or simply churn up gigantic waves in the Atlantic ocean. I’m certain cruise line executives with ships sailing from northeast ports like New York and Boston are busily searching for alternate itineraries should it be necessary to move the ship out of the storm’s way.

The captain of a Princess ship once told me, “any cruise ship captain who gets caught in a hurricane would have to be pretty stupid.” The good news is that officers have access to the most advanced hurricane centers. Remember, hurricanes are slow-moving bodies; if a storm threatens an island on your Caribbean itinerary, the captain will change course and cruise to other areas instead. I’m certain you won’t mind missing a port when it’s being plummeted by 100 mph winds and driving rain.

The Atlantic Ocean is a different matter. Hurricanes that don’t go ashore typically hug the coastline which means ships bound for Bermuda or the Caribbean may have move to a Canada/New England itinerary instead.

I’m always shocked when passengers complain that a ship’s itinerary changed to avoid a hurricane. You mean you WANT to be tossed about in high seas and wind so bad even officers get seasick? Of course there are threats of lawsuits, even though storms fall into the “acts of God” category which means the cruise line isn’t legally responsible. Not to mention, the small type on your cruise ticket also says the Captain can change itinerary or cancel a port for any reason whatsoever.

The June 3, 2008 prediction of the Colorado University’s Department of Atmospheric Science is that 2008 will be a “well above-average” hurricane season with eight hurricanes, four of which four will be intense. The National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) predicts a 65% probability of an above average season. They’ve been wrong the last two years and let’s hope that streak continues.

When a hurricane strikes, most of us would guess Miami, Ft. Lauderdale or Tampa would be most affected. But in 2004, Port Canaveral, near Orlando, bore the brunt in three major storms while next year Hurricane Katrina halted cruises from New Orleans and Mobile for a long time. I don’t recall that anyone predicted that.

The point is, the weather is too uncertain to let it affect your vacation plans. And the big advantage of a cruise is that a ship can move away from a large storm whereas in a hotel, you’re stuck. As someone who rode out Hurricane Hugo in Puerto Rico’s El San Juan hotel, let me tell you: It’s pure hell. Even worse than enduring that Category V hurricane, was being stuck in San Juan for three nights with no electricity or air conditioning because the airport was shut down.

Does the prospect of a hurricane keep you from cruising during the June through November season?

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